Melancholy (or post-teenage angst)…
I went out to take some pictures (for
walking around the woods next to the meadow, when I saw a broken string hanging
from one of the trees. It was weird, it made me feel really sad. It’s all that’s
left of the rope swing that Jay and Hallet (friends of mine from school) made a
few years ago.
It made me think about all the people that I used to
be friends with but don’t see anymore. Jay moved to Devon a few weeks ago and I
didn’t get to see him before he left. Hopefully he’ll come back up in a while
and I’ll get to say goodbye properly. There are so many other people who I don’t
see anymore for one reason or another. I’m going to make an effort to keep in
contact with people more in future. It’s so strange, over the last few years I
didn’t see Jay much but I always thought he’d be around but now I’m not sure
that I’ll even see him again.
I guess really I was just envious of
simpler times. I’m worried about what I’m gonna do when I finish uni and I
suppose I just wanted to be carefree again. To be fair though, I’d never want to
go through A-Levels ever again. With the exception of meeting Jo that was the
worst time of my life ever. I’m sure I’ll work out what I want to do when I
finish uni, things normally sort themselves out. I definitely believe
that.
Of course the irony of all of this is that I just checked my
email and Robert (from nagval) can’t make our meeting tonight so I didn’t need
to do the photos.